Wednesday, November 25, 2009

I'm a fool

Day 05

I don't know. I'm starting not to be me again. Argh. I let that feeling takes control. I shouldn't have let go. Or I'm just too stupid about all these. Gimme an answer, would you?

I hate it. Im never satisfied about something, i never feel great about something. What am I expecting more? I can't do it, I just can't do it. Can't I take it that way? I'm a human, a human will not be perfect in every way.

Im confused.

Im jealous of them who're happy. They're always happy because they accept everything around them. So why is it too hard for me to do the same thing? Im no one, i am just the same. Im not someone royalty, im not different from anyone else.

Im getting myself a headache. Im too sensitive, that's the problem. Everything, even the smallest little thing people do, i'll get so uneasy and jealous, like duh. Sometimes people say they understand me, but how can they when i don't understand myself either.

All in all, i have to get rid of that feeling. I can't let it control myself. At least, not now. I got to stay focus on my studies. I did badly for finals and im aware about that. I gotta work hard. I want to excel, I want to succeed. Talk is not enough, prove it. Im trying hard but i need time. And space. Please, give me some space to breathe, i want to have a precious life too just like you do.

Anyhow, i'm glad i have The Almighty to turn to.

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